QT 16 July 2013, Parents are responsible to train their children, but not for the results

1 Sam 3:11-14 (NIV) And the Lord said to Samuel: "See, I am about to do something in Israel that will make the ears of everyone who hears of it tingle. 12 At that time I will carry out against Eli everything I spoke against his family — from beginning to end. 13 For I told him that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about; his sons made themselves contemptible, and he failed to restrain them. 14 Therefore, I swore to the house of Eli, 'The guilt of Eli's house will never be atoned for by sacrifice or offering.'"

Note: This is a good verse for parents. We don't control the lives of our children and our parenting skills are not measured by our children. Samuel's children do not turn out much better than Eli's (1 Sam 8:1-5). But Eli is judged and not Samuel. There is a reason. We stand before God on what God requires of us, not on the results. We are to teach our children to walk before God, and generally speaking, they will--Proverbs 22:6 suggests as much. But Proverbs teaches general truths and wise sayings. They are not promises that God is held too (otherwise God would be condoning bribes, 17:8; 21:4). We are required to do the best we can with our children--nothing more, nothing less. Our children stand before God on their own cognizance. God judges us by our actions, not the results. Eli does rebuke his children, but apparently he could have done more. He could have restrained them, but he didn't. He should have removed them from their roles as priests. Samuel's sons are appointed as judges and perverted justice. Apparently Samuel is unaware. And while is not said, the appointment of a King does remove his sons from their roles. Eli is judged because he didn't take any action other than a rebuke. He failed to deal with sin. The same is not said about Samuel. We may not like the choices our children make. While they are young, we are to restrain them. But once they are adults, our responsibility for their sin ends. We hurt, we can pray, we can counsel and rebuke, but we can't control. Like God with Adam and Eve, or the Father with the prodigal son (and other son), the children, when adults, make their own choices. We, as Parents, need to do the best we can, nothing more and nothing less.