QT 1/10/2023 1 Sam 25:9-13, The danger of selfishness

1 Samuel 25:9–13 (ESV) —

9 When David’s young men came, they said all this to Nabal in the name of David, and then they waited. 10 And Nabal answered David’s servants, “Who is David? Who is the son of Jesse? There are many servants these days who are breaking away from their masters. 11 Shall I take my bread and my water and my meat that I have killed for my shearers and give it to men who come from I do not know where?” 12 So David’s young men turned away and came back and told him all this. 13 And David said to his men, “Every man strap on his sword!” And every man of them strapped on his sword. David also strapped on his sword. And about four hundred men went up after David, while two hundred remained with the baggage.

 

NOTE: In one sentence, Nabal uses seven first-person references. He is clearly self-centered and given his personality assessment in verse 3, "the man was harsh and badly behaved," he was probably a narcissist. Weller defines the disorder as:

 

"selfishness at the expense of others, plus the inability to consider others’ feelings at all." <https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/am-i-dating-a-narcissist#What-is-a-narcissist?>

 

We all struggle with aspects of selfishness: a need to be recognize, pride in our accomplishments, a sense of entitlement (when we have bought something expensive), envy, and a lack of empathy. The difference is that our sinful behavior does not rise to the extreme. But we are all in danger of becoming that person, a Nabal, if we do not take actions to prevent.

 

For instance, how many times have we become upset because of how our food was done in a restaurant or how a worker has treated us in a store? We all display a sense of entitlement, no matter our income.

 

What must we do to avoid becoming a narcissist?

1. Pray for others. When we pray for others, we take the focus off of our self.
2. Give an increasing amount of our money to charities. As we give away what God has given, we realize that it really is all owned by God anyway.
3. Read the scriptures daily. The word of God can wash away sinful thoughts and restore our mind that is corrupted because of our sinful self.
4. Serve in ministries that care for the poor or prisoners. As we see the struggles of people, we may not understand how they got there, but are hearts are touched.

 

PONDER:

1. I may not show all the signs of a Narcissist Personality Disorder (NPD), but do I recognize the selfishness and pride within myself?
2. What am doing or going to do to deal with my selfishness or sense of entitlement?

 

PRAYER: Father, I know I have many characteristics of NPD, but my problem is me and sin, not some disorder that is beyond help. The Holy Spirit has already greatly changed me, especially in the area of empathy. More recently I have seen progress in humility as well. Continue to protect me from sin and provide my daily needs. Continue to change me to become more like Jesus.