Notice on a slight format change:

Except for July 2012, these are mostly a collection of current devotional notes.

July 2012 is a re-write of old quiet times. My second child was born Nov 11, 1987 with multiple birth defects. I've been re-reading my QT notes from that time in my life, and have included them here. They cover the time before the birth and the few years immediately after the birth. They are tagged "historical." I added new insights and labeled them: ((TODAY, dd mmm yy)).

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Historical QT 22 Aug 1988, A tear and a smile


Phil 1:6 (NIV) . . . being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

NOTE: It is so hard to see my present circumstances as a "good work." They are so painful, so frightening, so tiring. Like Job, I ask the question; is it worth it? I know in my heart of hearts it is. I know I will look back on the days with a tear and a smile, but that doesn't change today. Please Lord, rescue my family; deliver us from the pain and suffering. In Jesus' name, Amen.

((TODAY, 22 Jul 2012: I don't remember what happened. A number of procedures failed during the first two years. Things that we put our hopes in -- doctors and medical science -- failed us. I believe we were trusting God  to work  through these instruments, but for whatever reason our hopes were continually dashed.

I was right in one respect -- as I re-read these journal notes, there are tears and a smile, but mostly tears. Tears because they are so hard to relive even in text. A smile, because, somehow we emerged out of it all. The marriage survived, the children grew up, and the pain subsided. And, God has blessed us in many ways. There are still struggles, and most revolve around the fears for our children despite the fact that they are now adults. And actually we added one more to the family when Sarah married. Tomorrow, Luke starts a new job in his chosen career field--he will be a security guard in a homeless shelter.))

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